By Ash Stevens
The babymoon. It would seem it’s yet another overhyped social fad that corporate America makes big money on. It certainly can be, but a babymoon can be so much more than blowing money and keeping up appearances.
A babymoon gives a couple an excuse to get out and enjoy their last days as a family of two. The daily grind can have a couple putting connection and intimacy on the backburner — something a couple is only 1000x more likely to do once they have a baby. A babymoon is a great way to recapture the romance and kinship, and to help keep it going through birth and beyond. A babymoon is also a great way to hash out a plan for addressing life with a baby.
A babymoon is a time to do things like:
- Make A Game Plan That Fits Both Your Needs: Does your honey love Sunday football with his buddies, but you don’t want to be home alone with baby for hours on end? Perhaps your man needs intimacy more than once every two weeks, but you’re a zombie after 10pm? Do you two want regular date nights, but there are a list of concerns over going out without baby? Could you use help with cooking and cleaning duties even though you’ve been Queen of the Household? (Let me answer that for you: Yes). Use your babymoon to devise a plan that meets the needs and concerns of both you and your partner.
- Throw All Ideas And Beliefs On The Table: No couple comes from the same family with the same experiences or the same ideas on health and the body or the same religious and political beliefs. Because of that, couples are guaranteed to have all kinds of ideas and perspectives. This is a big deal when it comes to matters of parenting and partnering, and it can become a massive source of tension. So, talk about all of this stuff ASAP: vaccination, circumcision, spanking, co-sleeping, babysitting, television and electronics, childless booze-loving buddies, baby-free downtime. These little things can turn into nasty conflicts, so get yourself and your partner on the same(ish) page by talking about your parenting perspective. You may not come to a full agreement on your babymoon, but you’ll both have your brain gears cranking.
- Get Real And Talk Worries And Concerns: No one goes into parenthood without anxieties. It may be worry over work schedules, game nights, or a certain childless friend. There may also be worry about major concerns like about postpartum depression, or keeping a strong partnership. Whatever we’re feeling anxious about, we need to be bringing it up before baby arrives, not after. ew partners are world-class psychics, and they’re not going to have any idea what’s bothering us until we fill them in on the details. We’re gonna have to speak up at some point, so it might as well be now.
- Get A Support System In Place: There’s enough to do in a day between working, cooking, running errands, and taking care of household tasks. Throw a baby into the mix, and the roughest of your childless days will suddenly appear gloriously simple and wonderful. Don’t make the mistake of thinking you have to do this all on your own. America loves the idea of people being independent individuals, but this ain’t how family works. As a mother who knows other mothers and who is very aware of the postpartum depression afflicting American women, I am begging you to set up a support system for yourself.
If sanity means getting a meal service or having an occasional babysitter, then do it. If you want to pay for a Spotify subscription to try to get baby sleeping more than two hours, then get yourself signed up. If you and your hubby need time alone every two weeks, then set up a schedule with friends or in-laws right this very minute. Whatever you and your partner need to be happy parents and happy partners, make sure you have it. Our kids are only babies once, and this is not a time best enjoyed by struggling to cope and survive. It should be a time to enjoy and remember years down the road. Make that possible by creating the support that you need.
Obviously, a babymoon stands to be more than just a consumerist fad. But how to create the perfect babymoon? Here are some ideas!
- Find The Perfect Vacation Spot: Do you want privacy but a great location? A quality abode but without the high price? A romantic trip minus the hustle-and-bustle? Well, vacation rentals are the new “hotels,” and they can offer all these things. Sites like Airbnb offer great deals for renting rooms as well as homes, while Tripping offers price comparisons between rental home sites.
Of course, a “staycation” is a great choice too. Come or go, the best babymoon offers quality time together doing things a couple enjoys. If that’s hiking, reading, wading in the ocean, or having a carb-fest, then that’s exactly what your babymoon needs. Set a vision for what you want to experience during your babymoon, then you and your honey can find the perfect place to bring that vision to life.
- Special Photos For Forever Memories: Your days as a family of two are coming to a close, so it’s time to squeeze in the very last photos of you before you were parents. What do you want your kids to know about you? How do you want to commemorate your pre-parenthood days? And let’s not forget — what do you want to remember about your babymoon? Capture meaningful moments and create magical scenes that you’ll enjoy looking back on for years to come. Because, once baby is here, you’ll be lucky to find yourself in a photo (and even luckier to be in a photo you actually like).
To capture those quality moments, you’ll need a quality camera. Considering that a camera is as likely to be lost as it is to cost a fortune, a cell phone upgrade may be the best way to address this. The iPhone 7 plus has photographers going gaga thanks to its dual-lens, 12 megapixels and its portrait mode feature. However, it’s proving to have some heavy competition in the Samsung Galaxy S8. Neither phone is cheap, but they are both water-resistant — a HUGE plus with babies. But if the budget is tight, you can still get yourself a 12 megapixel camera with the iPhone 6S and the Galaxy S7 (and for about three hundred dollars less).
- Plan, Plan, Plan The Romance: It’s not enough to just hope that a babymo0n will bring you and your love together. Your vacay should be packed with opportunities for connection, whether you seek them or seize them. Don’t hope for love-inspired moments — plan on seizing them and creating them.
When it comes to romance, there’s nothing like the “togetherness” of sharing a new experience. You could make nachos together, try out archery, run around town on the city bus, get a couples massage, hike to a private waterfall, take dance lessons, or write hilariously bad love poetry. Normal and pleasant, or unusual and quirky — just plan something that’s new to both of you (and potentially the most fun thing you two have EVER done). Doing something new is exciting, but sharing something new with your partner can make for a fun and heartfelt experience.
Have you been on a babymoon before? Are you planning a babymoon now? Share your stories below!
Ash Stevens is a gardener, a writer, and a fan of all things green. Her love for health and sustainability began with her journey into motherhood, and it’s grown exponentially ever since. She’s passionate about living a healthy lifestyle through gardening, cooking, and spending time outdoors. If she isn’t writing or reading up on exciting green trends, she’s probably playing Connect Four or swimming in the river with the kids. You can find her on Facebook and Twitter.